Greatest Love

For the last eight months I have cried every day, every single day. I really thought you could run out of tears. If you ever wondered you can’t, they always find a way. But I will tell you the tears are different. Time is different. Our life is different. And our family will forever be divided by a mark in time. Life with our physical Melina and life with our angel.
As a mother I’m telling you don’t let your brain linger on that last sentence for too long. Because it rocks me to my core anytime I say it. It will forever take my breath away. Because those tears, that feeling, and that hurt is love. And I’m missing one of the greatest loves in my life.
In Melinas absence though I am learning that same love that takes your breath away also allows you to heal. The same love that destroys you also heals you. Will I cry everyday for the rest of my life? Absolutely. Because I will never stop loving my baby girl. But that love also shows me so much good. It makes me put my phone down and play. It makes me focus harder on the day to day fun. Trust me we always add sprinkles. It makes me smile at every small victory. That love makes me realize what is valuable. That love makes us better.
Tonight Keith and I got to meet for the first time with our international DIPG collaborative to start fighting. Tonight we listened. Tonight we realized how powerful this group is. A group of parents fighting for the love they lost. At the end of our meeting we had to take a vote. As we waited for our foundation name they called “Melina Edenfield“ and for the first time in eight months something felt right. Choose Joy!